☕ You Can Tell a Lot About Someone by Their Coffee Order (And Their Ex)

By K. at Brewtiful Beginnings/Publication Owned by on
“Cinnamon oat latte

 I didn’t mean to start a coffee cult, but here we are.

Every time someone orders a drink in front of me, I’m mentally diagnosing their attachment style. Is it petty? Maybe. But it’s cheaper than therapy and way more fun with foam art.

💬 Caffeinated Confessional

Let’s just say... I’ve dated enough baristas to know: your coffee order spills your secrets faster than your group chat screenshots.

  • That guy who asked for black coffee with no sugar? Emotionally constipated. Probably thinks pineapple on pizza is "too adventurous."

  • The girl who ordered iced oat milk lavender lattes? She cried during Euphoria... but still went back to her toxic ex twice.

  • My friend who orders decaf? Honestly, I still don’t trust her. She also listens to productivity podcasts at 2x speed and texts like she’s in HR.

Coffee reveals who we are when we're trying to look cute but are actually falling apart.

☕ Coffee Talk: Sips & Subtext

There’s power in your daily ritual.
You’re not just choosing between almond or oat milk—
You’re choosing who you want to be today.

Are you:

  • Calm and chill (chamomile vanilla matcha girlie)?

  • Hot and dramatic (double espresso with a side of delusion)?

  • Soft yet unhinged (pumpkin cold foam, all year round)?

The truth? We’re all just caffeine-soaked contradictions looking for peace in a paper cup.

🍹 Sip of the Week: “I Don’t Text My Ex” Latte
Cinnamon oat latte in a clear mug on rustic wood table with lipstick-stained napkin and morning sunlight. Cozy and feminine coffee aesthetic

(but let’s be honest... you still stalk them)

This one tastes like closure, confidence, and the chaos you almost outgrew.

Ingredients:

  • 2 shots of espresso (or ½ cup strong brewed coffee)

  • 1 tbsp real maple syrup

  • ¼ tsp ground cinnamon

  • ½ tsp vanilla extract

  • ¾ cup steamed oat milk

  • Optional: pinch of cayenne for heat (or drama)

Instructions:

  1. Brew espresso. While it’s still hot, stir in maple syrup, cinnamon, and vanilla.

  2. Steam oat milk until velvety and foamy.

  3. Pour over espresso. Sprinkle with a little extra cinnamon if you’re dramatic.

  4. Sip like you just blocked someone and meant it.

🍨 Bonus Brew: The “Leave Him On Read” Iced Mocha
“Café table with half-finished latte, open journal, lipstick, and soft morning light. Cozy behind-the-scenes moment.”

Because you deserve a drink that’s cool, rich, and completely unbothered.

Ingredients:

  • ½ cup cold brew coffee

  • 2 tbsp chocolate syrup

  • ½ cup oat milk or cream

  • Ice cubes

  • Dash of sea salt (for depth... and shade)

Instructions:

  1. Drizzle chocolate syrup inside a glass.

  2. Add ice. Pour in cold brew, then milk.

  3. Stir, sip, and leave his “wyd?” on seen.

💭 Final Thoughts

Your coffee order is your aura.
It tells people if you’re healing or hiding, thriving or lying.

And honestly? Your latte deserves more than a mug that says ‘but first.’

💌Which coffee order screams you today?

☕ Drop a comment below
📸 Share your mug with us on Instagram
▶️ Watch the full vibe on YouTube
💌 Submit an ANONYMOUS coffee confession (or an ex-related roast) — I might feature it in the next Confessional.

Post brewed by K at Brewtiful Beginnings ☕

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